If I could select a word that best describes the majority of American parents, that word
would be guilt-ridden (内疚的). How sad it is to see parents become the willing victims
of the "give me game", only to discover that, no matter what they do, it isn't enough. In the
end, they are looked down for their lack of firmness and blamed when their spoiled children
get into trouble. With this in mind, I shall first answer this question: "What do parents owe
their children? And I shall start with what they don't owe them.
     Parents don't owe their children every minute of their day and every ounce of their energy.
They don't owe round-the-clock car service, singing lessons, tennis lessons, an expensive car
when they reach sixteen, or a trip to Europe when they graduate.
     I take the firm position that parents do not owe their children a college education. If they
can afford it, fine. But they must not feel guilty if they can't. If the children really want to go,
they' II find a way. Here are plenty of loans and scholarships for the bright and eager who
can't afford to pay.
     After children marry, their parents do not owe them a house or money for the furniture.
They do not have an obligation to baby-sit their grandchildren when the parents were on
vacation. If they want to do it, it must be considered a favour, not an obligation.
     In my opinion, parents do not owe their children an inheritance, no matter how much
money they have. One of the surest ways to produce a loafer is to let children know that
their future is assured.
     Do parents owe their children anything? Yes, they owe them a great deal.
     One of their chief obligations is to give their children a sense of personal worth, for
self-esteem is the basis of a good mental health. Parents owe their children firm guidance
and consistent discipline. Parents owe their children privacy and respect for their personal
belongings.
     No child asks to be born. If you bring a life into the world, you owe the children something.
And if you give him his due, he'll have something of value to pass along to your grandchildren.